Summer 09

June 19, 2009/Friday – very unproductive day. Didn’t sleep much from last night. Watched juno, and saw 5. Walked home cause I can’t effn drive. Ate, watched teevee. Crashed at one pm, till almost 3? Yeah.. then I was just sortah awake, dad got home, then left for a haircut, went to sleep again, mom came home, mom mad cause I didn’t finish laundry, ehh. She cooked dinner, phones been dead since like one. I feel empty without a phone! Uhggg. I left the charger at michelle’s! need to get that soon.. right now, I just showered, dryed and straightened the hair, kang ameila and rc are here looking at coach bags or something, im in my room typing this shhhh, im hungry, and tired, ahh, and still need to pack a month worth of luggaged clothes. Kinda bummed im leaving cause my friends, but I know oc is gonnna be helllaaa fun! Pink berry! Woo. Well, all for now.

Summer 09

June 18,2009/ Thursday- woke up around one ish, got up. Showered. Continued plans with michelle. Ate jello. Little sister was cleaning the house, which was weird cause im usually the one doing all the cleaning. So, michelle invited me over to her house to eat, after that, we were jst chilling. Had to be home like ten thirty, bummer! So we made further plans to sneak out again.. I got home, chilled for a little, trying to figure out what to do.. I did a little laundry, changed to pajamas etc. then I easily snuck out which was crazyyyy! Spent the day with samnjuly & michelle. Straightened sam’s hair, lol. “crashed at Michelle’s? followed on to Friday morning.. .

Summer 09

June 17.2009/Wednesday – This day was nothing special. Same routine as follows. Woke up late, again..  can’t really recall this day but I do remember it was one heck of a night. I did nothing all day, so it upset me that I was going to do nothing again all night. - I have to admit, I felt a tad great t hat I didn’t sneak out afterall, but what didn’t feel great was knowing that my best friend was upset with me. So waking up late, all I worried about was If she was mad or not, so I texted her & figured out a lot through those texts that were exchanged. As best friends that we are, we solved things and all was back to normal again. I think a friendship that can communicate well shows how strong they are as being bestfriends. [m-squared!] :) so after that, since I can’t drive! I had nothing else to do, so I decided to bakeeee. It was this chocolate butter recipe from bettey crocker? And yeah. Little sister helped which was nice bonding time lol. That night- played sims on gamecube with anne.

Summer 09

June 16, 2009/Tuesday – Again, woke up late. :/ (I don’t like that.. ) showered, did pretty much nothing but text. Mom got home, went to Susie’s Deals, bought “Nurse Scrubs” (Nurse outffits) for Marie. Got bored so I went to Cingular, saw two potential phones, I think one was called.. damn! I forgot, but it was pretty much the same thing except one is smaller. How stupid. So its, touch screen, then it slides into a keyboard. After, we got Wendy’s. Haha, funny story, so The cashier dude, made convo with me and my mom, saying “Hi, How are you guys this fine evening it is.” & I was like, “good.” I walked up to the cashier & he was just quiet, changing the receipt retriever thingy, & I was like “are you gonna take my order or..” & he says “no.. im just changing this real quick.” So I got all embarrassed! Lol. So I was jst pretending to look at the menu so I wouldn’t look too stupid. Haha. Then he goes, “Now I can take your order.” Uhg.. lol. So before I could even say four words of my order, he interrupts me to say, “your curls are very pretty, they look really nice.” Lmao. And I just said thanks..lol. so I guess as I walked away my mom tells me that the cashier dude was talking about me to the other co worker guy. Ewww haha, how embarrassing! I told my mom, they probably were just staring cause my pimples! & she said no. lol. That was funny though. & gross cause they watched us walk away and leave. Haha. Not even interested, so don’t trip, lol. Got home, ate, texted, teevee, & now.. planning. Lol. But its already 11. So I guess this ends my day. I wish I could drive already!! :’[I found myself getting lost in the game of Solitaire & then I finally get a heads up on an idea. So its summer right? & we’re teenagers. So “sneaking out” just goes with the program na? idk. Knowing me, if you did.. I like to do the right things, I like to be daring but my conscience takes over me at times, making most my decisions of rebelling a failure. So, plans were, to sneak out to watch a movie. Little did I know little sister here was going to sneak out aswell to meet up with her friends or whatever.. I let her out, leaving me at home, while my friends came over, but I chickened out and decided to stay at home. I could tell that they got mad, & I didn’t like that feeling. –

Summer 09

June 15, 2009/Monday – Monday was free hot dog at hot dog on a stick, & free sliders at applebees. So, I woke up late, once again.. showered, got ready just cause. I watched New York Goes to Work, Charm School, and the Laker game I missed on Sunday. My friends had work, so I was just at home. How lame. :/. So my mom came home early so we went shopping at Macy’s. lol. Mother daughter bonding moment right there lol. So that hot dog on a stick place was packed, so we left. Got home, and my cell phone was blowing up with calls. It was charging so, I was getting annoyed with it buzzing. Yikes, I guess my friends kept calling. So, we were going to eat out at applebees, just cause. Ideally, I like to have the time to get ready, and what not, so I was pretty much rushed that night. I didn’t want it to be like a double date sort of thing cause that’s just wrong. I mean like, we’re all just friends, nothing ever more than that. It sucked that Martha had to leave cause I didn’t want it to be awkward with everyone else. But it wasn’t too bad. After everyone left, me & michelle ended up sitting outside of applebees, watching the random video from last night. Her sister picked us up sooo late lol. I got home around 12 again. & the rents weren’t mad, …. Weird. Lol So I got home, changed and whatever, & layed down. Slept like at, 2ish. Freakn Dominic! Lol

Summer 09

June 14, 2009/Sunday – Woke up late again, well technically, I woke up at like 9 cause I thought we had church. But my mom didn’t come to my door like usual so I just went back to sleep lol. My parents went out to hit the stores or something, and anne marie went along. So I was home alone. AGAIN. Whatever. So I just took a shower. Parents came back, and I spent the day watching Aladin & some other movie I forgot, and I got ready cause I wanted to go out no matter what. My plan was to go see Dance Gavin Dance in Slo, but Juan didn’t pull through! So I was bummed, and had no plans. So anne had plans I guess, going out to her friends party or something. So then, plans were to go to michelle’s house, and pick off from there. My mom made a last decision to go to church at 5:30, so I was mad cause anne never has to go to church. But then I felt bad because I shouldn’t have a bad attitude about going to church. So I fixed that. Sorryyy. :/ then my mom dropped me off to michelle’s house. We just chilled, texted. Then went online for a bit. Her sister’s friends came over, quite entertaining. Lol. Then we were on a search for rap songs, like, for a long time! Lol. We ate, and brainstormed for another video idea. Lol. Monique’s lamp! So michelle’s friend Arabian, was on the phone, “Gangstarr licious. ” lol. We tried rapping for him, then all a sudden we just made a video. How random? Very random singing/lip syncing/ and dancing lol. It was a memory made thing! Lol. I got in trouble after though, my mom picked me up. I totally forgot that they had work, yikes.. and It was like twelve. Ending that night, I found out that Anne ended going to the show in slo! Uhggg.

Summer 09

June 13, 2009/Saturday – So, picking off Friday night/morning. We woke up I believe around 12? I woke up from joel ho’s text, lol. So I guess we didn’t really plan the morning or this day’s plan. So we just layed in bed until we thought of something. & I guess we didn’t rly think of anything cause we literally were in my room the whole freakn dayyy! Haha. Well lets start from the beginning, we woke up feeling hekka tired. Idk whyyy. Lol. We talked about last night. My mom went out, bought us taco bell. We ate in my room,. Then layed down again. We sat up, then layed down again. I guess we were home alone again, then we layed down again, lol. We were watching a marathon of “I’m a Celebrity—Get Me Out Of Here!” then we layed down again. Lol. We didn’t know what else to do. So we were just texting people. Something finally came up! Uhm, kinda. So Jan was having a kickback. I didn’t rly get along with someone there so we decided not to go. And we layed down again. Hahah. Sigh.. it was crazy how we had a lazy day in my room, like. Not even planned to. Haha. We played “Who would you rather chose.” – very interesting, lol/ then Michelle played guitar, lol. My internet wasn’t working so that was lame. We made another random video, haha. We looked gross >.< then michelle hadda go. Left around 9 or 10? Or idk? But she spent more than 24 hours at my house. Haha.:] I think its sooo awesome how we could have a good time doing absolutely nothing! Lol. That just shows how good our friendship is! Lol. After that. My mom made me fold clothes!  uhg. Haha. Then I finallyyy showered! Felt soooo good to be clean again! Lol. Thennn. I think I just crashed. Another great day

Summer 09

June 12, 2009/Friday – so today was the last day of my sophomore year of high school! It honestly went by too quick. I could still remember my freshman year when I was so nervous. & now I’m going to be a freakn junior! Scarrryy… So I went to the SMH graduation, it was sad saying goodbye to everyone. But I had summer to look forward to. After that, made a quick stop at seven eleven, monster slurpie! Lol I was rlyyy tired., but the mall was the next stop. So Michelle, Sam, & Julio and I were sitting outside oneway looking at our yearbook signatures and whatever, then got picked up. I got home, ate! Cause I was starving like marvinnn! Lol. Plan was to have michelle sleepover and go out that night. Had a verrrryyy well planned out evening lol. So my parents and grandpa were going out to eat, then casino. Therefore, leaving me home alone, free to do whatever the hell I want haha. So it was like 7ish, and I was just in my room, waiting for michelle to come over already. She came around 9, and we were making plans. We hit up liz, and she picked us up. So we went to like 3 or 4 parties that night. The first one, was freakn funny,- one word. WalMart! Lol. … Yaaaaniccc. Alright, maybe two. Ha. Second party, was scaryyy. So we left that one a-sap. We drove up in down the streets, then finally ended up at this one party with liz’s sister. Pretty fun night. Until the part where I get busted and got a call from my mom. I got home like around 1 ish. Or something. Surprisingly, didn’t get in trouble. Lol J though it was one heck of a night to kick off our summer, we weren’t done that night. Lol. Only michelle would get this haha. We had a talk with Emmanuel, then made some random video lol. Then fell asleep at 3. Suppperrrr funnn.!

Volleyball

Tryouts/conditioning
has been going on for about a week
and a couple of days now.
So far I am doubting my chances of making varsity
& it is pissing me the eff off that I doubt so much.
I have so much pressure to be positioned as a setter,
and honestly, my setting is a bit rusty & I would much rather prefer
be a back row hitter or whatever. Anything but set.
I played last year as a setter, and one of the captains on JV.
Sorry to say but, I do NOT want to play JV again.
I know I could do well and have potential to play varsity,
but I'm starting to see that some people are doubting me as well. :/
I wanted to cry one day at practice because I was being put down
as a sucky setter. It just makes me feel as if I'm not
good enough
and I hate feeling like I'm not ever good enough.

I talked it out with a couple of my old team mates and
they brought me back up and told me not to give up.

My ultimatum was that If I don't make varsity then that's it.
I don't want to play JV. I'm tired of losing.
I know I have potential to play varsity
If I don't make Varsity then screw it, I'll just get a job instead.

I think I've changed my mind...
I will consider playing JV again..
Idk.
I will cry though!
lol

*Let's hope I make Varsity! :)

Music

My Guitarist, Yared.
I'm missing Juven.

Anyways, We have been planning to work on just playing with music.
My friend Yared & Juven play acoustics, and electric.
I attempt to sing my best haha.
All for fun.
Soon we'll start recording & post em on my
youtube or something.

But yeah, I'm excited to get started! :)

Finding Yourself

Admit it or not.

Throughout highschool we could be lost
by the transitions we encounter.
During these times and experiences we are introduced
to new things, to an atmosphere that is totally out of our elements.
Whether we chose to do certain things, affects us,
that eventually will mold us into the person we chose or ought to be.
Being analytical as I am, I notice explicit things as the days of my highschol
journey continues.

Several clicks are formed, though we do not like to label,
we are all hypocrites in obvious or hidden ways.
We have the typical highschool people.

My freshman year I was completely LOST.
I wasted so much time keeping to myself
instead of growing up and expanding my capabilities.

I made sure that my sophomore year, I would get more involved
and actually do things that I wanted to do.

& now, I feel like I am at a stable point in High school,
I am more likely to do more things that could be out of my comfort
but experiencing and learning is all through the process.
I'm learning who I can trust, where I feel best, & who with.
I am learning more about who is still lost, &
I don't affiliate myself with trouble, because I'm better than that.

I admit, that I could be judgmental.
I don't understand why people act the way they do,
Although it is in my interest to learn & meet new people.

If I know what I want, I seek to get it.

So far, all the stressing about grades,
all the friend drama,
all the clashing between groups,
all the insecurities,
all the boy drama,
heartaches,
and almostwasrelationships

are all still happening.

& though I honestly want to say that I am found,
I can't.
Because, I know that I am still growing as a person.
Whether others will accept me or not.
I'm happy as I am now.

currently./